The secret diary of .. Chris Hipkins being boring

2026-02-27 - 16:08

MONDAY It was nice to see Simon Bridges today at the Auckland Chamber of Commerce where I gave my State of the Nation address. “How are you,” I asked. “Yeah all goods,” he said. “Looking forward to your speech!” “I haven’t seen you in a while,” I said. “We’re both busy,” he said. “You’ll have had a full plate hashing out fresh ideas and innovative solutions with your team in advance of your speech!” “I remember seeing you around Parliament quite a lot back in the day,” I said. “But that was then and this is now,” he said. “What are the headlines going to be from your speech?” “I can’t believe summer is nearly over,” I said. “Well, it’s time for you to raise the temperature in the room,” he said. “I’ll introduce you and then you can make your speech!” “It’s been nice talking to you,” I said. TUESDAY It was nice to sit down with Toni for dinner this evening after a busy day at work. “I like the vinaigrette you made for the salad,” she said. “It’s oil, lemon, balsamic vinegar, and seasoning,” I said. “How did you do these potatoes?”, she asked. “I boiled them,” I said. “What are these sausages?”, she asked. “Hutton’s Sizzlers double cheese,” I said. “Pass the tomato sauce, please,” she said. I looked out the window. The light in the sky was pale. “I can’t believe summer is nearly over,” I said. WEDNESDAY It was nice to catch up with Jacinda on Zoom today. “I hear you are going to live in Sydney,” I said. “Seed-nee,” she said with a laugh. “I better start talking Australian!” “Oh—right—yes—I get it—you were putting on an Australian accent,” I said. “So how’s election year going?,” she asked. “Are you and the team coming up with fresh ideas and innovative solutions?” I said, “I’m setting out our priorities around jobs, health, homes and the cost of living, but won’t be announcing policy until Budget Day in May. When I make those commitments I want to know I can deliver on them. I want to wait until after the Budget so we know what we’re dealing with. I think that’s very responsible.” She looked very sleepy on the Zoom call. This impression was reinforced when she began yawning. “Neve wants me,” she said with a laugh. “Best report to the boss!” “Well, nice to talk,” I said. “And all the best in Sydney. How’s the weather?” THURSDAY It was nice to sit down after dinner and watch Coronation St at 9.30pm. Jodie was tracked down by a stranger, Bernie threatened to report Mal for breaking in, and Maggie reminded Lauren who calls the shots. FRIDAY It was nice to sit down with Toni for dinner this evening after a busy day at work. She asked, “Have you made salad, potatoes, and Hutton’s Sizzlers double cheese for the fourth night in row?” “Yes,” I said. “It’s a good, reliable meal. I think that’s very responsible.” We ate in silence. I looked out the window. The light in the sky was pale. There was some infinite melancholy to it, a sadness that stirred up strange, mystical, almost Celtic feelings of shadows and legends, of an epic quest, a long journey, of things lost in the distance, like sea spray rolling in along a stretch of beach that you walk towards but never touch, like something ending before it began. “I can’t believe summer is nearly over,” I said.